


"You could've just taken me on a picnic."

by PinkAfroPuffs



Category: Fate/Grand Order
Genre: Anniversary, Established Relationship, F/M, Mild Gore, babinci doesnt exist here dont @ me, commission, i should write him more for you tbh., today we appreciate izou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:36:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26503762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkAfroPuffs/pseuds/PinkAfroPuffs
Summary: Too prideful to ask for help and too insecure to admit he may be out of his depth, Okada Izou takes anniversary gifts to a new level.Maybe he shouldn't have taken the job into his hands so effectively, though.
Relationships: Fujimaru Ritsuka/Okada Izou | Assassin, Okada Izou | Assassin/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 22





	"You could've just taken me on a picnic."

**Author's Note:**

> Commission for my friend dontstalkhaleyshedontlikethat on tumblr! I love you my dear and I hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing it. I hope I did he and your character at least a little bit of justice!

Simply put, he was only good at killing- hence the name "manslayer Izou". He embraced it like one would a child; in its own way it was his special moniker for him alone, the notorious assassin who was only caught and beheaded after his long trail of carnage.

But that was all it was. Simple. And carnage. When it came to other things, he was at a loss. He thought about it when Valentines’ rolled around- his birthday, that he wasn’t used to celebrating, when Haley, his Master (and oftentimes, lover) offered to host a drinking party for him- and almost kept up with his crazy whims for the rest of the night. Almost. But that was the sake’s fault, not hers.

So why couldn’t he…?

Why couldn’t he figure out what he could do for her?

He could see her from behind, her now short hair brushing against full cheeks (he’d helped her cut it, and even from here, it was a damn good job), talking with another one of the Servants. Kinda ridiculous how cute she was. Kinda ridiculous how much he didn’t want to disappoint her. 

He sort of groaned to himself, pulling his muffler over his mouth again. He wasn’t good with words, like that bastard Ryouma; if he wanted to sneakily find her something she wanted, he’d have to ask someone else (and the thought nearly died so quickly it could have been killed with a large rock). Damn. What did girls like, anyway? Sweets? Kids? The heads of their enemies?

...wait. That’s it. He could do that. The head of her enemy! The only question was...who Haley’s enemy could be at this point in time. 

He’d already gone to work decapitating each and every one of the shades in their vicinity: shadow servants, beasts- and at one point some guy who looked like an elephant or something. Who was left? Most, if not all of the Servants left in Chaldea were there because Haley permitted them to be there. Anyone else immediately got the boot at summoning (as he’d seen with a certain Welsh king and her horse, who hadn’t even managed a ‘Lancer’ before the Master had pulled the handle and sent her to the shredder). It was kind of hot of her, actually. But that _still_ left less targets than to be desired.

It didn’t matter. He’d return with a whole pile of her enemy’s heads and be able to give her something. Even if that something was not much at all. 

* * *

“Oh, Haley, I’ve got something that needs your attention.” Leonardo DaVinci flagged down the young master. She seemed to be smiling at the papers in her right hand; a little more amused than Haley would have liked. “It’s rather interesting, actually! But it’s not my business per se…”

What the hell did that mean? She sort of crossed her arms, screwing her mouth to one side. “What? Is it funny or what? Just spit it out.”

A very strange looking grin pulled at the genius’ lips and she gestured with her head down the hall. “I’ve been getting some complaints from the staff and a couple of Servants that there’s a strange smell coming from the northwest corridor on the third floor- in the Assassin wing.” 

Hm. Assassin wing. Not Saber or Archer? “Is it-”

“Okada Izou’s room?” DaVinci’s eyebrows went up with an almost malicious glee. “Why, I’m so glad you asked! You should see for yourself, I think.”

So the two headed down the hall to the Assassin’s room. After a couple of knocks, Okada Izou opened the door a crack, enough for only his uncovered eye to be seen through it. “Yeah?”

“Can we come in?” Though chipper as always, DaVinci’s smile felt a little forced (or maybe she was trying not to laugh?). “We got a couple complaints about the smell from your room.”

“Who?!” He half shouted, clearly ready to fight, eyes blazing. “Who’s complainin’?” When Haley peeked her head over DaVinci’s, Izou’s shoulders relaxed- though only a bit. “Oh, it’s you. You can come in.” Then he eyed the Caster. “You can beat it.”

DaVinci didn’t seem too put off by it. “Well then, I’ll leave you to it!” She grinned, sliding out of the way. “I’ll leave the clean up to you, too, then.”

Clean up?! “What?”

She was gone before Haley could interrogate her further, running much faster than any NEET she’d ever come across, though she knew catching her was out of the question. It was hard enough to get information out of her as is.

It took less than a moment to realize that though his face through the door had been, for the most part, clear and free of any dirt or grime, upon closer inspection it was clear that Okada Izou was stained from head to toe in blood. Or at least it looked like blood. Usually it was blood, with him, so she couldn’t be blamed for her reaction. Assuming it wasn’t his.

“What the hell happened to you?” She found herself saying, fingering his near-spotless muffler. “Did you get into a fight with a ketchup bottle?”

His eyebrows scrunched in an aggressive form of confusion. “Huh?” Though, rather quickly, what replaced it was a smug, “Nah, I took care of a ton of your enemies for you.”

For a second, she blue screened. Then, a bit forcefully, “Did Altera-”

Izou’s smile dropped and he shook his head at her, mildly annoyed. “What? She ain’t comin’ back,” he grinned, “and if she did, I’d make sure she stayed gone. That ain’t what I wanted to show ya.” With one arm he gestured to what looked like a large pile of bodies on the floor; dozens of griffons without wings, centaurs without heads, naga tails, and werewolf maws soaked the formerly empty space in the middle of his room with sticky red gunk- some stuck to the tiles. Some of it looked grotesque- humanoid beasts that that had clearly been lying in a pile for several days on a tarp drowned in pools of their own dried blood, some matted their manes and fur, should they have any. 

“Wh- When did you do-”

“It’s our anniversary,” he answered simply, closing his eye (though he still seemed downright pleased). “Wanted to get you something. It ain’t much, but it’s all I can do.” Then, with a shrug, “I got ya chocolates, too.”

Admittedly, all that gross stuff on the floor was kind of cool, but, “You couldn’t have just,” she leaned over the pile, reaching towards one of the headless bodies, murmuring, “let me watch you do this or something-”

“Yeah? You wanted to watch?” He grinned devilishly, which made her enjoy being in his room just a _little_ bit more. 

“Or you could have just taken me on a picnic,” she grinned, though she’d stopped thinking about food a long while ago.

“Huh? A what?” He spat, looking incredulous and Haley remembered why she’d given the man her grails in the first place. 

With one hand, she gently tugged his muffler away from his mouth; with the other, she put one of her hands on his shoulder. “A picnic,” she repeated. “I’ll explain it right after I thank you for your gift.”

“Yeah?” He grinned. “What sorta ‘thankin’’ are you thinkin’?”

Haley kicked the door shut with one boot and only smiled.


End file.
